Pretender
Filed under Writing Journal on May 22, 2006
Tagged: technical writing
Back when my wife used to work in property management for a Fortune 500 utility company, she would often share with me her fear that someday soon her supervisor and colleagues would discover that she was a fraud, that she was in over her head and didn’t really have the skills to do the job she worked her way up to. I attributed her comments to her humbleness or pessimi . . . I mean, realism, and would chuckle and assure her that they wouldn’t have hired her if they didn’t think she could do it, or that she just had a bad day. Such feelings were alien to me, being the self-confident person I am, and I really couldn’t relate.
Until now.
This is my second week working for the state as a technical writer, and I spent the day today at one of the county offices interviewing end-users of some software that I am writing the manual for. As I was driving to the location, I felt as though I were a little boy playing at being a technical writer, and that when I started speaking with the county folks, my ruse would be discovered. It was a strange sensation.
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May 23rd, 2006 at 7:01 am
I’ve always felt like I was in over my head, regardless of the job, how long I had it, or how good I was at it. The only “job” that doesn’t make me feel that way is writing. Go figure.
So…did the county folks discover your ruse? Or did you discover theirs (i.e., that they don’t really know what they’re doing, either)?
May 23rd, 2006 at 8:13 am
Yep, I can relate, especially considering how I got my current position 7 years ago. I got hired as an instructional designer with only a background in writing, graphics, computers (worked in a multi-media lab in college), and limited teaching.
Now, I’m on the verge of getting promoted to senior (since I’m the one who usually trains new hires and answers questions to current IDs and Sr. IDs), and I’m still wating for someone to discover I don’t know what I’m doing.
Maybe it’s paranoia. Or the start of wisdom (realizing just how little I really know).
Yeah, that’s the ticket.
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:53 am
Right back at ya, Kam. I’ve felt like an imposter since I took this job, and there are only very occasional moments that make me feel otherwise.
I think that’s kind of the nature of work — it’s always got at least that little tendency to crush your confidence and pride.
Cheers
May 23rd, 2006 at 5:34 pm
I was able to maintain my cover, Marcy, thanks to a high rank in Bluff.